16 June 2023

Stuff’s pretty steady, nothing really out-there interesting going on. I’m just trying to get back into the habit, so here I am.

I’m still kind of wanting to pinch myself over the whole living situation. I get that I’m helping L out in some important way — for instance, yesterday I brought in firewood for her (she doesn’t get as cold as Dad gets, but she doesn’t have my cold tolerance) because she isn’t supposed to lift that heavy a weight — but I doubt I would have found another opportunity like this, ever. She really stuck her neck out, because I could be anybody and I’m the one moving into her personal space, not the other way around. I need to stop fucking around and start bringing in at least a little money for now, and not just the Substack income, but if I can get that squared away I think I’ll be all right for a while.

We’ll see, but it’s looking good.

I need to think about something nice to do for her. Draw her dogs, maybe. I have seen no art-type doggie portraits of specifically her dogs around here anywhere. I don’t usually draw animals, but if I use the same method as for people, it can’t be that fucking hard.

Neighbor has been over two days in a row. For some reason, L cooks for him. Not daily, but like a few times a week. I think I mentioned several posts ago that I suspect they’re an item, either that or they consider one another honorary family. Even with that, there’s bound to be a specific story to do with the cooking. I know he has Crohn’s, and that’s all I know for sure. I might ask, I might not. I kind of get the idea that while I’m welcome here, doesn’t mean I get to hear their whole life stories. That’s fair.

Yesterday he had a funny story. He was about twenty-six and was reading about Lawrence of Arabia’s weird sexual predilections — I have no idea what the context was. But apparently Lawrence tricked some military officer into beating Lawrence’s ass until he got off. The way Neighbor put it was “until he [Lawrence] had a seminal emission.” The man’s sixty-three; I can’t believe he’s never said come in a sexual context before. I’m not mocking him. I get the sense that he wanted to convey the story without making it prurient (well… any more than could be helped). But that’s not the funny bit. Remember, Neighbor was twenty-six when he read about this. Apparently he was pretty sheltered. Next time he went in to see his doctor, since they often had conversations about random embarrassing body-related stuff, he asked the doctor whether he’d ever heard of anything like that; was it actually possible to get a “seminal emission” in response to an ass-beating? (My phrasing, not his.) The doctor just kind of looked at him and suggested that it was probably not a good idea for Neighbor to try it. L and I about fell out. I said, “Oh god, he thought you were saying…” and L said, “He thought it was one of those ‘I have a friend who’ stories!” It was a hoot.

The movement they’re involved with means that sometimes people get together to schmooze, which is coming up in the next few months. Long-Distance Guy (see previous post) was here for a previous gathering, I think he said last year? Recently, anyway. He commented on a post about the event and I asked him if he was going to be here again. He said probably. So that will be interesting. There are actually two things coming up in the next few months and I’m not sure about one of them but if this other thing doesn’t cost anything then I’ll very likely go. I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t mostly to meet Long-Distance Guy and see what that’s about. The aims of the movement in question also interest me, I just don’t feel particularly empowered to help with much of anything. “I am just an egg,” my old church co-members used to say. Might as well go look at a dude. And chat with him. And stuff. Mostly not stuff, but in case there is stuff. Which there probably won’t be.