Yesterday I took L to the airport near Arcata, so it was an hour’s drive in each direction. I understand why it made sense for me to drive her and it will actually be easier for me to get sleep and feed the dogs timely, but having to be up at 5am and be able to drive safely meant fucking up my efforts to go later before sleeping. I’m not that thrilled, to be honest, but I will figure things out. The only thing about this is L surely knew this was coming before the DGR conference and could have warned me and maybe I could have backed out of the temp job or refused it depending on when she knew and notified me. But it’s too late to care, really. Unless I absolutely cannot adapt to the situation, I’m in it to win it. It’s only four weeks and I desperately need that money.
Anyway it was a nice little road trip. Times like this I wish I still had my car. There are so many places along 101 where you can just pull over and gawk at the coastline. It is definitely gawk-worthy. If I don’t get around and see things while I am here, I’m a sucker, full stop.
Interestingly, I think bicycles are allowed on 101; definitely for parts of it. I’d be terrified, especially going around those curves (the speed limit is 55mph in some places and 65 in others!!! And then goes down to 30 on some of the curves), but it’s always a possibility, I suppose. We’ll see?
Right. No. Like as not I’ll sit in the house a lot. There is something wrong with me. Always has been.
The dogs are beside themselves. Obviously they miss their mom, but the salt in the wound for them seems to be that when someone gets out of the car, it’s not L. That really blew their minds yesterday, and then they had to see it happen again today. They’re more or less behaving, but they know the bedtime routine is not fucking happening and the girls in particular want to stay outside well past sunset. I liken this to kids with a sitter staying up late because it’s the sitter. I just hope L doesn’t have to do much adjusting when she gets back.
I was wrong about the mint cutting. I had a look at the raised beds today and I don’t know what the Green Being I Had Not Previously Noticed is, but it makes me think of nightshade and is definitely not a mint. L still could have cut it, or maybe Neighbor did or, as was my first thought, maybe M fucking did it when she was here (I noticed it was gone very soon after the conference) after hearing me say I wanted a cutting of it… I have my suspicions about her. But we’ll see. It doesn’t matter. I got my own, and anyway, joke’s on whoever took the one I’d had my eye on, because Neighbor’s big dog Duke pissed on it once. Ha ha ha. FUCKERS. Meanwhile, my cutting’s doing really well. It should root just fine. When I first moved here I noticed a jar with paintbrushes in it on the shelf and L says I can have the whole thing. Glass jar, good size, so that’s what the cutting is in, standing in water. Works great because I can just leave it in the south window (my room’s windows face east and south) and not worry about the curtain knocking it over. Now I just need to remember to get the fixings for planting it when it’s time. I may just get a window box instead of a normal pot and then let it go crazy, except I have reservations about that because plastic. We’ll see. If I could find a metal one, that would work, except I just looked on Amazon and the search is a mess. How do you give me back plastic pots in your search results when I asked for metal? Clowns. But we’ll see. Like as not I’ll just get something at fucking Walmart. The usual.
Yesterday, because I was bored, I got onto Facebook’s little dating feature that apparently you can only get to through the app. Same thing happened that always happens with the stupid dating apps: I came to my senses and realized I have nothing to offer and even if I did, there’s no way I can be myself with a guy. I’m too weird to, like, 95% of the male population. Even if I didn’t look like a fucking troll, that would still be a problem. But I also look like a fucking troll. So there you go.
Part of me wishes things had worked out with Stuart. He was poised to push me away anyhow, though, so I really don’t know what else I could have done. OBVIOUSLY not jumped the gun and unfriended him. I mean aside from that, because it wouldn’t have been enough.
Well, if he ever makes an overture, I’ll take him up on it. He won’t, but if he did.